Monday, October 08, 2007

today bond wif wushu aft the farewell rehearsal...well....i realise tt excos will get at least a merit....regardless of their achievement....and i realise..i am the onli non-exco who got merit!!! dam stylo la...and dunno why i am the 1 representing the merit awards wif tracy....out of nowhere sia...too zai le...lolz...

long time nvr sit dwn and haf some good talk le...today actualli is qte shuang...participating members are mi kr teng darren wanching and cara...but mostly is mi and kr toking....every1 seems to be having a good laugh....if i can haf the mood to sit dwn and tok wif ppl....actualli i haf de confidence tt i can make their mood happier and entertain dem de....but aft so mani things happening...i cnt haf this mood beri often de...and is out of access to certain ppl.....seeing that at least u can make other ppl ard u smile and laugh....de feeling is u ownself will feel happy too...dunno la...but at least dis is how i feel at tt moment....

today tio said by nette...actualli i qte unhappy de..play play nia dunnid so serious and get angry lo...

dis world dun haf much ppl understand me de...who can noe wat my mind is thinking....can one see if i am real happy or unhappy juz based on my face? a person who is forever smiling doesnt mean he will feel happy like forever....mabbe deep inside his heart lies a wound too....a wound tt he close up to the public...one smile may be dere to cover up for a thousand pain....

mabbe the way i do things...too extreme le ba...if dis will make ppl feel uncomfortable or unhappy....den i say sry ba...i shall restrict my words and actions....

from now on...u all oso dun say nette is nv shen or anythin le...juz in case she unhappy or angry....yup...

wa i feel tt i nid to start from econs real real soon....if nt realli gg le...i seriously dunno how to study on econs when i m so bloodi noob man....

today was like talkin abt sixu wif teng...hmmm....i sort of feel tt wat i do is unfair to sixu oso...but mabbe is becos i selfish ma...i rather i dun tok to him to remind myself of some sad things...and sometimes i am realli qte angry with the fact tt he is so close to von...mabbe it isn't anger at all..it is jealousy....but we are made of flesh and blood...wat is wrong when one feels negative emotions within himself...we r man...nt god...well...although i noe mani ppl hope mi and sixu can be frenz again...but before i can completely get over von....dis is qte hard...even if i tok to him as u all wish....i m juz tokin to him for the sake of toking...i will feel uneasy and uncomfortable...

dun test the untestable....
and i cnt forget the unforgettable...

BANKAI!!!