Tuesday, February 06, 2007

juz reached home from AJC...haix...ah ma pass away....gonna attend the wake...until friday leh....tt means maybe i will miss sch from tue(today) until fri....i will try to make it to sch ba...this is nt a period to rest oso....2 yrs ago my ah gong wake....u needa burn the paper continuously...den take turns...den is beri hard to sleep....den mostly u cnt sleep de....den like 2,3 days nvr sleep liddat.....haix...sat sentosa i got the funeral as well...which is MOST IMPORTANT de....now is either i go sentosa aft the funeral or i juz dun go....sian...all tt is planned beforehand is all gone.....also, my mum say 100 days cannot go other ppl hse...coz maybe will bring bad luck to other ppl...tt means i nt going out to BAI NIAN for this yr cny....-_-.....GG sia...den zhexu hse lion dance oso die...den the plan to go cindy hse oso gone...everythin...fuck la....but my mum say if the owner of the hse dun mind...jiu can go.....so i needa ask....haix....so sian now....

kinda flash back memories...when young my both parents working so they pass me to my this ahma to take care...she say aft i bath i refuse to wear my shirts n shorts n she haf to chase around the hse to grab me n wear....finally she bo bian...so she pass to my another ahma to take care of....i remember every holiday my this ahma will come my hse stayover and i will be beri happy becos when i m young..i beri wilful and i always ask my ahma to scratch my back for me...coz beri comfortable...and she always do it lor....den she ask me help her massage den i dunwan...she always gif in to me sia....den until she get stroke...den she sort of nid wheelchair...and she no longer come my hse....and all illness come in...she keep going in n out of hospital...struggling for almost 2 yrs le...i sometimes see liaoz i oso sad...think tt liddat is quite suffering...juz lie on bed whole day feeling weak....haix...now collapse liaoz...i oso dunno is sort of a relieve for her...or wat...but death is inevitable..so juz take in stride.....

i tink i nt beri human sia...i got a bit sad...but nt realli beri sad tt type...dun even haf the urge to cry...but i tink at the final stage where the body is pushed to be burnt...den i will cry n shout...which happens 2 yrs ago for my ah gong funeral....i shall vent it all out on the last stage ba....

sad tt i maybe cnt go sch wif cw for this last week for his PAE days....sorry pal.....now the prob is to catch up wif hwk....gg sia...dun think abt tt ba...


wat a great timing....juz before cny and this happens...now is hindering my levlling up as well...everythin seems to not go smoothly....haix....

BANKAI!!!